The Dance

A solo piece, a group dance, a pas de deux or a tango
Free flowing, transcendental, choreographed within in a millisecond of variance
Performed on a stage, in a bedroom, on a street corner, or in my head as I go to sleep
Rhythmic, pulsating, achingly slow, seductively extended, quick paced, surging
Set to vocals with no instrumentation, pure drums, pure base, set to silence apart from my heartbeat
A flip, twist of the body, roll of the hips, fling of the hands, toss of the head, wink of the eye, twirl of the legs, clap of the hands
Sensual, instinctive, traditional, challenging, alienating, incorporating, welcoming, exhausting, refreshing

Some days I feel like an amateur who just started to learn how to do a ronde de jambe other days I’m at the height of my skills performing a series of soutenu in pointe shoes
Yesterday I ended the evening with a few step ball changes and shuffles to Duke’s ‘It Don’t Mean a Thing’
This morning I freewrote with my bare feet and danced to Nina’s ‘See-Line Woman’

I’m no longer the me that existed before the dance
or
Maybe this me always existed but emerged as the dance began
The dance lived in me all along and my experiences lead me here
I embody the dance and am a dancer who has had a mix of emotional and physical aches and fears
Yet I cannot stop-because I find myself looking forward to all of it
Life without the dance would be as empty as a field where flowers once sprung in abundance
There are days where it all seems too difficult and putting forth any effort to practice is far from what I want
So those days I don’t dance
but
Just because I am not physically engaged with the process does not mean I am not mentally dancing
Other days I force myself to move and it is painful but then it slowly becomes easier and I feel as if I am tapping into memory and as if my spirit is running the show

I am engaged on a level that combines the physical and mental with something altogether more unifying
The dance never ends- it comes forth at any moment
It resides in me always- just there beneath the surface- ready to come out full stage when the chance arises
The dance engages and it takes hold of my senses and continuously transforms
Ecstatic fulfillment this is who and what I am- a dancer

U.E.O.O